{"id":597,"date":"2025-06-16T20:14:00","date_gmt":"2025-06-16T17:14:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bernakaya.com.tr\/blog\/?p=597"},"modified":"2025-06-16T21:02:26","modified_gmt":"2025-06-16T18:02:26","slug":"hizasizlik-soyledigimizle-yasadigimiz-arasindaki-bosluk","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bernakaya.com.tr\/blog\/hizasizlik-soyledigimizle-yasadigimiz-arasindaki-bosluk\/","title":{"rendered":"Hizas\u0131zl\u0131k: S\u00f6yledi\u011fimizle Ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z Aras\u0131ndaki Bo\u015fluk"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Dan\u0131\u015fmanl\u0131k s\u00fcre\u00e7lerinde en s\u0131k kar\u015f\u0131la\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131m \u015feylerden biri, ki\u015finin kendine dair olduk\u00e7a net bir fikri oldu\u011funu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmesidir.
\u201cBen art\u0131k ne istedi\u011fimi biliyorum\u201d der\u2026
\u201cBu kez ger\u00e7ekten kararl\u0131y\u0131m\u201d der\u2026
Ama biraz daha yakla\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131zda fark edersiniz:
C\u00fcmle kararl\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcr; ama davran\u0131\u015f karars\u0131zd\u0131r.
Niyet oradad\u0131r; ama ad\u0131m yoktur.
Ya da ad\u0131m vard\u0131r, fakat y\u00f6ns\u00fczd\u00fcr.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bu bir yalan de\u011fildir.
Ama bir hizas\u0131zl\u0131kt\u0131r.<\/strong>
S\u00f6zle eylem aras\u0131nda, niyetle davran\u0131\u015f aras\u0131nda sessizce a\u00e7\u0131lan bir bo\u015fluk.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"S\u00f6zler<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

\u201cCiddi ili\u015fki istiyorum\u201d der\u2026
Ama her seferinde ba\u011f kurmaktan ka\u00e7an, duygusal eme\u011fe kapal\u0131 insanlar\u0131 se\u00e7er.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYaln\u0131z kalmak bana iyi geliyor\u201d der\u2026
Ama yaln\u0131z kald\u0131\u011f\u0131nda hemen birilerini arar; kendiyle ba\u015f ba\u015fa kalmaktan ka\u00e7ar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cArt\u0131k ayn\u0131 d\u00f6ng\u00fcye girmeyece\u011fim\u201d der\u2026
Ama d\u00f6ng\u00fcn\u00fcn ad\u0131 de\u011fi\u015fir, i\u00e7eri\u011fi hep ayn\u0131 kal\u0131r.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cKendime \u015fefkat g\u00f6sterece\u011fim\u201d der\u2026
Ama i\u00e7 sesi h\u00e2l\u00e2 ac\u0131mas\u0131zd\u0131r; h\u00e2l\u00e2 bask\u0131c\u0131.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cBen netim\u201d der\u2026
Ama davran\u0131\u015flar\u0131nda s\u0131n\u0131r \u00e7izmeye gelince geri durur.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Peki, Hizas\u0131zl\u0131k Nedir Ger\u00e7ekte?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Hizas\u0131zl\u0131k yaln\u0131zca d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnceyle davran\u0131\u015f aras\u0131ndaki fark de\u011fildir.
Ayn\u0131 zamanda zihinle kalp<\/strong>, niyetle enerji<\/strong>, s\u00f6yledi\u011finle ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131n<\/strong> aras\u0131ndaki mesafedir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ve bu mesafe a\u00e7\u0131ld\u0131k\u00e7a, ki\u015fi yava\u015f yava\u015f kendine olan g\u00fcvenini kaybeder.
\u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc kendisiyle tutarl\u0131 olmayan biri, ba\u015fkalar\u0131yla da ger\u00e7ek bir ba\u011f kuramaz.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Fark edilmeden s\u00fcren hizas\u0131zl\u0131k zamanla \u015funlar\u0131 do\u011furur:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \n
  • Neden yoruldu\u011funu bilemeden hissedilen yorgunluk<\/li>\n\n\n\n
  • \u201c\u00c7ok d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyorum ama ilerleyemiyorum\u201d s\u00f6ylemi<\/li>\n\n\n\n
  • S\u00fcrekli yar\u0131da kalan ili\u015fkiler ve kararlar<\/li>\n\n\n\n
  • Ve d\u0131\u015far\u0131da aranan cevaplar\u2026 Oysa \u00e7atlak i\u00e7eridedir.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n

    Hizas\u0131zl\u0131k Nas\u0131l Fark Edilir?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

    \u0130lk ad\u0131m: Kendine cesaretle bakmakt\u0131r.<\/strong>
    Ama \u201cBen ne yap\u0131yorum?\u201d de\u011fil,
    \u201cYapt\u0131\u011f\u0131m, s\u00f6yledi\u011fimle uyumlu mu?\u201d<\/strong> diye sormakt\u0131r.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc ki\u015fi \u00e7o\u011fu zaman ne yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131<\/em> bilir.
    Ama neden yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131<\/em>, kimin i\u00e7in yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131<\/em>, neye hizmet etti\u011fini<\/em> fark etmez.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u0130\u015fte bu y\u00fczden \u015fu be\u015f soru, hem ayna hem pusula olabilir:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

      \n
    1. S\u00f6ylediklerimle yapt\u0131klar\u0131m aras\u0131nda tutarl\u0131l\u0131k var m\u0131?<\/li>\n\n\n\n
    2. Davran\u0131\u015flar\u0131m, de\u011ferlerimi mi yans\u0131t\u0131yor; yoksa korkular\u0131m\u0131 m\u0131?<\/li>\n\n\n\n
    3. \u201cNetim\u201d dedi\u011fim yerde ger\u00e7ekten ad\u0131m atabiliyor muyum?<\/li>\n\n\n\n
    4. Bir karar verdiysem, o karar\u0131n sorumlulu\u011funu ta\u015f\u0131yor muyum?<\/li>\n\n\n\n
    5. Yoksa sadece se\u00e7im yapmadan s\u00fcre\u00e7leri, ili\u015fkileri elimde tutmaya m\u0131 \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yorum?<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n\n\n\n

      Bu sorular bir aynad\u0131r.<\/strong>
      Ve herkes o aynaya bakt\u0131\u011f\u0131nda k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir \u00e7atlak g\u00f6r\u00fcr.
      O \u00e7atlak, k\u0131r\u0131lmak i\u00e7in de\u011fil \u2014 hizalanmak i\u00e7in<\/strong> vard\u0131r.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

      Peki, Hizalanmak Ne Demektir?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

      Hizalanmak, her \u015feyi bilmek ya da kusursuz olmak demek de\u011fildir.
      Hizalanmak; i\u00e7 sesinle temasta kalmakt\u0131r.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

      Bu \u015funlar\u0131 i\u00e7erir:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

        \n
      • S\u00f6yledi\u011fini ya\u015famak<\/li>\n\n\n\n
      • Niyetinle eylemini ayn\u0131 y\u00f6ne \u00e7evirmek<\/li>\n\n\n\n
      • Karar\u0131nla davran\u0131\u015f\u0131n aras\u0131ndaki mesafeyi kapatmak<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n

        Bazen \u201cistemiyorum\u201d demek de bir hizad\u0131r.
        Bazen \u201chaz\u0131r de\u011filim\u201d demek de.
        Yeter ki bu c\u00fcmle, ka\u00e7mak i\u00e7in de\u011fil<\/em>, ger\u00e7ekten i\u00e7ten gelsin.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

        \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc insan\u0131 en \u00e7ok yoran \u015fey;
        Bir \u015feyi ba\u015farmaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmak de\u011fil,
        Kendi i\u00e7inde farkl\u0131 y\u00f6nlere \u00e7ekilmektir.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

        Netlik, Sadelik, D\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f\u00fcm<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

        Netlik sadece karar vermek de\u011fil;
        O karar\u0131 ta\u015f\u0131maya g\u00f6n\u00fcll\u00fc olmak<\/strong> demektir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

        Hizas\u0131zl\u0131k fark edilmezse \u00e7eli\u015fki<\/strong> \u00fcretir.
        Ama fark edilirse, d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f\u00fcm<\/strong> ba\u015flat\u0131r.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

        Ve bazen dan\u0131\u015fmanl\u0131k, bir yol \u00e7izmek de\u011fil\u2026
        O ilk \u00e7atla\u011f\u0131n fark edilmesini sa\u011flamakt\u0131r.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

        \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc en g\u00fc\u00e7l\u00fc d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f\u00fcm,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

        Kendi i\u00e7inden g\u00f6r\u00fclen bir \u0131\u015f\u0131ktan ba\u015flar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

        \"\"<\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

        Dan\u0131\u015fmanl\u0131k s\u00fcre\u00e7lerinde en s\u0131k kar\u015f\u0131la\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131m \u015feylerden biri, ki\u015finin kendine dair olduk\u00e7a net bir fikri oldu\u011funu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmesidir.\u201cBen art\u0131k ne istedi\u011fimi biliyorum\u201d der\u2026\u201cBu kez ger\u00e7ekten kararl\u0131y\u0131m\u201d der\u2026Ama […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-597","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-her-gun-yeniden-baslarim"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bernakaya.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/597","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bernakaya.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bernakaya.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bernakaya.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bernakaya.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=597"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/bernakaya.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/597\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":604,"href":"https:\/\/bernakaya.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/597\/revisions\/604"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bernakaya.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=597"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bernakaya.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=597"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bernakaya.com.tr\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=597"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}